..bit flat really

..as the title suggests-thats how i feel today and also last night
-this 2:40 really seems to be eluding me :( im fit enough, im training well-just got not ticker :(

-anyway heres the breakdown-picked up loren and headed off to sandringham(took over 50mins) did warm up with loren(and TB as usual, who very kindly lent me$5 since dufus head forgot it(me!)
..started getting a little antsy cos stu wasnt there(he was supposed to be at the 200) again TB very kindly went to the 200 for me...(parking issues or something)
..and i did something all ATHLETES should know better-i walked in front of the finishing line as they were finishing a race(elec tming) so i was getting yelled at(deservedly) while i was waiting for my race to start(I suck-it was very bad-i went and apologised later) fortunately it wasnt the A grade race.
i shared a lane..and i knew i needed to settle at the back-was planing to be a couple of secs behind Loren so for the first 200 i went about a few metres behind..and went through closer to 36 than 35(still way too fast), then 40 so 76(should have been 77/78) 42 in the 3rd 200 is acceptable cos i usually come home strong, 1:58 at the 600 so right on track, into the straight, bit of a headwind and i was in survival mode-nothing in the legs 2:41.2 so it WAS a SB(season BEST) but i am very very disappointed..
i need to go slower in the first 200-its killing me in the last 200
i know i shouldnt worry about that number so much but i want it... and i know im faster than this time last year-had done one 2:44,one 2:45 and the rest 2:48s whereas this season 2x2.42,2x2:41 consistently.. and when i ran the 2:38 at the end of the season i was running 68s 400(and im closer to 70) don have the leg speed

anyway there you have it.im supposed to go for a light 30min run -but to be frank, feeling a little unmotivated-stu has said i should go for a run walk then stretch..sigh...so i suppose i will- its also coming up to that special time so thats not really hoping my mood
..and i have just been stressing as i woke up to hear there had been a plane crash from NY to Charlotte(where my sis flies all the time) anyway she has texted me-they are in florida at the moment so thats good :)

EDIT-well i went for what could nearly be called a jog-it was not so good...first 20mins the legs were yuk it was really more of a stumble-then felt pretty good for 5 mins and then tired again for the last 5mins. anyway its done, im sure it will be good for the legs.... but more pleasing..today was the first day in over a month that i have run without strapping my back-(been taking anti inflamms for last few days(bit of a flare up after moving a big TV-ooops by meslef.oops)